Monday, February 05, 2007
New Games!
Henry David Thoreau would puke if he saw my apartment. Still unopened boxes stacked atop other unopened boxes. A wooden chair floating aimlessly in my kitchen. The occasional scratch of a puppy trying to find freedom. But there are games. They aren't hooked up yet, but all my games, and all my systems, are surrounding me once more. And, for all you math fans, my gaming screen will be cubed in a few short hours. Gaming on a 3" screen for an entire month would blind an eagle. I'm not sure how I'll adjust to 27" of Lost Planet. I'm sure it will be pleasant, though. Oh, and one more note before I present the latest entries in gaming's expanding library - my last post, detailing the epic adventure Quiz and Dragons, was the 600th post in the history of this site. All you doubters who said we would never pass 599 were wrong. Dead wrong. On with the show!
Lunar Knights - Isn't there a law against false advertising? You would think this game would be awesome. Knights on the moon? Who wouldn't love that?
"Knave! Thou hast besmirched this fair maiden's name. I hereby banish thee to the Sea of Tranquility!"
I'm sorry, I can't even write about the real game now. This medieval venture on the moon just sounds like way too much fun to sully my head with thoughts of vampires and mindless combat. Though a question does come to mind: since there isn't any water on the moon, what would a king fill his moat with? Will I ever be able to come up with a substitute better than Space Water? Either way, someone should really make this game instead of the real Lunar Knights.
Final Fantasy VI - Square is in a very bad place. Not only did they run out of new ideas five years ago, but they are now blowing through all their old properties at an alarming rate. They just finished releasing two updated classics late last year. Final Fantasy III came out in November. Just 80 days ago they finally released the "real" Final Fantasy III and now, just when people are finally coming to terms with their crazy counting system, they release the version of Final Fantasy III that everyone grew up with. What is even more ridiculous is that Final Fantasy V, the prequel to FFVI that was actually released for the first time in America ten years after its predecessor, saw a GBA update of its own a mere 90 days ago. For those counting, that is three Final Fantasy ports in three very short months. They released FFI and II back in 2004 and FFIV in 2005. So they have now used up all of their classic titles. Looks like we're stuck with a never ending stream of Final Fantasy VII remakes and spin-offs until Square can come up with an original idea.
Diddy Kong Racing DS - Finally, a game that's actually worth talking about. The Nintendo 64 original is one of the finest examples of a mascot racer I have ever played. The only superior entry in the bloated genre is the game that started it all - Super Mario Kart. Until Nintendo gets an online version of the original running on their Virtual Console, kart fans will have to settle playing this saccharine-drenched offering. Unfortunately, this is merely an update to the original. But it does have a few new elements. Most importantly, you can race online. Early word is that six racers can compete (up from the four player battles in Mario Kart DS) and you can even use your microphones to communicate before racing begins. Not too shabby. For those who strive to be the next Picasso or Dali, you can even design your own courses. Unfortunately, good news is always followed by bad on this site. Rare has taken "advantage" of the many tools of the NDS. You actually have to blow on the microphone to start your hovercraft and scratch the touch screen to propel your kart. It seems like a horrendous idea, and it could potentially ruin the entire experience, but I am still hopeful. You'll have to tune in next week when I finally get my hands on this game. I'm crossing my fingers from now.
Lunar Knights - Isn't there a law against false advertising? You would think this game would be awesome. Knights on the moon? Who wouldn't love that?
"Knave! Thou hast besmirched this fair maiden's name. I hereby banish thee to the Sea of Tranquility!"
I'm sorry, I can't even write about the real game now. This medieval venture on the moon just sounds like way too much fun to sully my head with thoughts of vampires and mindless combat. Though a question does come to mind: since there isn't any water on the moon, what would a king fill his moat with? Will I ever be able to come up with a substitute better than Space Water? Either way, someone should really make this game instead of the real Lunar Knights.
Final Fantasy VI - Square is in a very bad place. Not only did they run out of new ideas five years ago, but they are now blowing through all their old properties at an alarming rate. They just finished releasing two updated classics late last year. Final Fantasy III came out in November. Just 80 days ago they finally released the "real" Final Fantasy III and now, just when people are finally coming to terms with their crazy counting system, they release the version of Final Fantasy III that everyone grew up with. What is even more ridiculous is that Final Fantasy V, the prequel to FFVI that was actually released for the first time in America ten years after its predecessor, saw a GBA update of its own a mere 90 days ago. For those counting, that is three Final Fantasy ports in three very short months. They released FFI and II back in 2004 and FFIV in 2005. So they have now used up all of their classic titles. Looks like we're stuck with a never ending stream of Final Fantasy VII remakes and spin-offs until Square can come up with an original idea.
Diddy Kong Racing DS - Finally, a game that's actually worth talking about. The Nintendo 64 original is one of the finest examples of a mascot racer I have ever played. The only superior entry in the bloated genre is the game that started it all - Super Mario Kart. Until Nintendo gets an online version of the original running on their Virtual Console, kart fans will have to settle playing this saccharine-drenched offering. Unfortunately, this is merely an update to the original. But it does have a few new elements. Most importantly, you can race online. Early word is that six racers can compete (up from the four player battles in Mario Kart DS) and you can even use your microphones to communicate before racing begins. Not too shabby. For those who strive to be the next Picasso or Dali, you can even design your own courses. Unfortunately, good news is always followed by bad on this site. Rare has taken "advantage" of the many tools of the NDS. You actually have to blow on the microphone to start your hovercraft and scratch the touch screen to propel your kart. It seems like a horrendous idea, and it could potentially ruin the entire experience, but I am still hopeful. You'll have to tune in next week when I finally get my hands on this game. I'm crossing my fingers from now.
// posted by Tom @ 5:58 PM 
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