G-pinions

Just a day after officially relieving the redesign of the Nintendo DS and once and for all nailing down the name of their product, Nintendo has started their ad campaign for the little handheld you can control with a Q Tip:




Ah, if only Nintendo had that sense of humor. That is clearly a fake, but made me laugh hard enough I attempted to pass it off as legitimate news. While those other sites give you all the news that’s fit to print, we offer up a nice selection of both real and fictional news that leaves readers with a sense of optimism those truthful places just can’t offer.

In other news, NFL2K5 has completely taken over my life. I am currently typing this with my feet as I attempt to kick a 50 yard field goal. If I make this I go up by an even 33 points. I must be playing someone better than Brendan, shocking as that may seem.

I had every intention of writing about my exploits in the greatest football game ever, but got tired at the thought of it. I will have to compose some sort of 5 part series on NFL2K5 as it is the only way I could cover every amazing aspect of this game.

Moving on to other news – EA has further cemented themselves as the most evil company in all the land. They just announced today that they have purchased little known Criterion. I had never heard of them before today, but apparently they are in charged of the much loved Burnout series. This announcement comes only days after EA announced a strategic partnership with Crytek, the developers of the critically acclaimed FarCry first person shooter released for the PC earlier this year.

While it may seem hypocritical to piss on EA for buying developers while I look away when Microsoft or Nintendo does the same thing, I feel I have some right to do this. First of all, EA is more evil than Tonya Harding with a shotgun. But, most importantly, EA just buys any good PC developer and any console developer they can get their hands on. They already bought and ruined Westwood and Maxis (what self respecting gamer plays the Sims anyway), are they going to run the beloved Burnout series into the ground as well?

The reason why everyone should be upset about this is complete lack of competition. You may like EA and their games, but, as EA grows larger and purchases more developers, there is less and less competition in the world. Crytek created one of the most amazing game engines available on the PC for FarCry, a game many gamers loved. And now, with just a flick of their check writing wrist, EA has purchased the rights to this technology.

You may not see a problem with this, but the idea that EA is in charge of some of the best technology in gaming is a scary idea indeed. Whereas Microsoft is trying to help the gaming community as a whole by building the XNA engine, EA is hording developers to turn the industry into a one publisher monopoly. Think about it in terms of sports. It’s hard to get upset at an owner who shells out money for the best players. He clearly wants to build a championship team more than anything else in life. But, as he spends more and more money to assemble this unbeatable super team, the sport suffers because no one else is able to compete with them. No one else can spend as much money as they can. Sure, the owner has every right to spend his money and fans of the team are obviously happy, but everyone is losing because there is no more competition.

I’m sad now… if only I had a super great football game to cheer me up….


NICK'S DISAGREEMENT WITH THIS:
(Mc Shea - I figured we should just keep arguments/discussions within the same post, if you don't like the idea I can make it it's own post)

It's been said before, but I'll say it again - Tom, you ignorant slut. First, before I get into another boring EA argument no one wants to read, let me learn you a thing or two about Criterion. They are not "little known"; any gamer worth his weight in great football games knows that they're responsible for developing RenderWare, the software/studio kit, or 'engine' as some would call it, that powers roughly a quarter of all games on the market (now listen up kids...). Sega, UbiSoft, Rockstar, Midway, Konami, Sammy, Sony, SOE, Lionhead, Activision, Atari, THQ and EA are just some of the companies that use RenderWare extensively to power everything from Grand Theft Auto to NBA Ballers to Spongebob Squarepants: Battle for Bikini Bottom. You slut. They might have only made a handful of games themselves, but without their middleware many of our games would look and play a whole lot uglier. Plus, they're developing Black, the apparent "everything-killer". Recognize.

Now that I'm done educating, I'm ready for a good ol' fashioned EA argument. Look. You're missing the main difference between EA buying a company and Microsoft/Nintendo/Sony buying one. When one of the big three does it, it's to have exclusive publishing rights - always, every time. They are buying a name, or a brand or line of products people are familiar with and enjoy, or someone who they feel can earn them an even better name in the marketplace with their games. Nothing more. It's adding weapons to your arsenal, and you, as a self-professed capitalist, understand that I'm sure. When EA buys a company, they're looking to make money, and they're not picky about whose money they take. Almost all of their games are brought to every platform. The upside of this? They can put a ton of money back into game development - since they're not catering to a particular system or demographic, their only goal is to make the most kick-ass games possible, to uphold their reputation. And with enough money and marketing backing 5-star companies like Oddworld Inhabitants and Criterion, the possibilities are amazing. They're expanding their tastes, and we'll get better games because of it. All they do is add money to a project, and make sure to reap the rewards. This way developers can do what they want (or even, more than they had hoped for thanks to the financial backing), while EA builds an even more quality name for themselves.

Why is a "strategic partnership" (read: they make games for EA now, capiche?) with Crytek a bad thing? This assures not only that FarCry: Instincts won't suck, but that they'll have the resources to be more than a one-trick pony, and keep their name out there. And they didn't ruin Westwood or Maxis, I dunno where you got that from. Westwood have been doing what they've always done - release a few decent-to-great C&C games, and a few other random underappreciated things. And you might not like Sim City or the Sims, but they're as popular as ever and Maxis would have obviously been doing what they're doing (in fact, almost definitely less), EA or no EA.

And here's the difference between a sports team manager buying up all the talent and a game publisher doing it - I'd be more than happy to be able to play ten great third-party games a year, even if that was every one released. Monopolies can ruin industries, no doubt, but it hasn't been going that way with videogames so far. Why do you think ESPN NFL 2K5 is so awesome? Nothing like a little competition, eh?

In the end, it comes down to this: If I can regularly play games like Burnout 3, The Stranger, and Timesplitters 3, I'll be completely content. And if my money can go back into development of games of that caliber (assumed caliber, obviously, but I'd bet my cat those all turn out as good as they look), fine by me.