Monday, April 12, 2004
I'm wasting my life!
Some people look at video games as a form of higher learning. The ultimate goal for all the hard work and effort we put in. The main form of entertainment in some utopian society. These people are wrong! I've said it before and I'll say it again: video games are a form of mind control to keep us weak minding folks in check and let the more powerful people rule the world. Case in point: Knight of the Old Republic.
This game goes above and beyond other games in the life control department by tricking you into thinking you are actually living your life there on screen, when, in actuality, you are only playing a game. But what a life it could be. Wielding two lightsabers while I crush the souls of those weaker or stupider than I. Collecting a bounty on the head of a woman… did I mention the bounty was placed on her for defending herself from the drunk advances of a man? Releasing a grateful prisoner from his shackles only to kill him after his spilled his guts. The power! The strength! I am unstoppable!
Knights of the Old Republic is a role playing game that gives you so much control over the path you take it actually feels like you are an active participant for once. In the very beginning of the game you are a lowly soldier on a Republic ship being attacked by the 'evil' Sith. At this point you have very little skill, no reputation, and a moral standing completely in the middle of the road. You are a pushover, nonentity in a world at war. Not the most likable character. But then, you get to take control over what they become.
As you may or may not have guessed, I chose the path of the Dark Side. I know, I was warned about it. Told that it is weakness that leads to the Dark Side. Told that only the greedy, power hungry, lightning bolt wielding wackos joined the Dark Side. Join the Light Side, I was urged, like that pussy Luke will in the future (this game is, of course, set thousands of years before Episode 4). They tried to sway me with the honor of doing what's right, helping those less fortunate than I, and being able to heal myself without a huge hit in my Force powers. But, alas, the lure of the Dark Side was too strong and now I am an ugly, vengeful little lady who doesn't take "No" or even "Please, take my credits, just don't kill me!" for an answer.
Did I mention the time I was walking through town and three loud mouth drunks started yelling at me? I could have just continued on my way, letting those weaker than me live their lives as they saw fit - but I am evil. So I killed the whole lot of them in 3 swift blows. Ah, how glorious that felt.
Or the time a crying woman approached me in a hunting town. She told me, through her thick tears, that her husband had died and only left her with the hide of a dead, rotting animal. The corpse was worth a small fortune, she whimpered, but she was not licensed to sell it. Please, she bleated out, gasping for breath and trying to see if my face was evil or kind through her dirty, salty tears, sell this animal for me so I can escape this wretched planet and live my life. I laughed at her, snatched the hide from her trembling hands, and sold it at the store. Then I pocketed the credits, a mere 500, nothing compared to the thousands I owned, and left her on the streets, crying her poor, dying heart out.
Oh how I love being evil.
This game goes above and beyond other games in the life control department by tricking you into thinking you are actually living your life there on screen, when, in actuality, you are only playing a game. But what a life it could be. Wielding two lightsabers while I crush the souls of those weaker or stupider than I. Collecting a bounty on the head of a woman… did I mention the bounty was placed on her for defending herself from the drunk advances of a man? Releasing a grateful prisoner from his shackles only to kill him after his spilled his guts. The power! The strength! I am unstoppable!
Knights of the Old Republic is a role playing game that gives you so much control over the path you take it actually feels like you are an active participant for once. In the very beginning of the game you are a lowly soldier on a Republic ship being attacked by the 'evil' Sith. At this point you have very little skill, no reputation, and a moral standing completely in the middle of the road. You are a pushover, nonentity in a world at war. Not the most likable character. But then, you get to take control over what they become.
As you may or may not have guessed, I chose the path of the Dark Side. I know, I was warned about it. Told that it is weakness that leads to the Dark Side. Told that only the greedy, power hungry, lightning bolt wielding wackos joined the Dark Side. Join the Light Side, I was urged, like that pussy Luke will in the future (this game is, of course, set thousands of years before Episode 4). They tried to sway me with the honor of doing what's right, helping those less fortunate than I, and being able to heal myself without a huge hit in my Force powers. But, alas, the lure of the Dark Side was too strong and now I am an ugly, vengeful little lady who doesn't take "No" or even "Please, take my credits, just don't kill me!" for an answer.
Did I mention the time I was walking through town and three loud mouth drunks started yelling at me? I could have just continued on my way, letting those weaker than me live their lives as they saw fit - but I am evil. So I killed the whole lot of them in 3 swift blows. Ah, how glorious that felt.
Or the time a crying woman approached me in a hunting town. She told me, through her thick tears, that her husband had died and only left her with the hide of a dead, rotting animal. The corpse was worth a small fortune, she whimpered, but she was not licensed to sell it. Please, she bleated out, gasping for breath and trying to see if my face was evil or kind through her dirty, salty tears, sell this animal for me so I can escape this wretched planet and live my life. I laughed at her, snatched the hide from her trembling hands, and sold it at the store. Then I pocketed the credits, a mere 500, nothing compared to the thousands I owned, and left her on the streets, crying her poor, dying heart out.
Oh how I love being evil.
// posted by Tom @ 5:57 PM 
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